Tag Archives: offended

Facebook is People Being People

Sometimes people get upset and bent out of shape over posts on Facebook – sometimes for good reasons, and sometimes for reasons not so good.  There are times when you laugh with people on Facebook and times when you want to wring their necks.  If you choose to be a part of social media, you will experience both.  Why?  It is simple.  Facebook is people being people, and if you can’t accept that, you have no business being on Facebook.

At the end of the day, there is one given with social media – people will post just about anything for just about any reason.  That means the odds are excellent you can find something to offend you if you look hard enough, or you are in the right frame of mind to be offended.  There are offenses to meet every taste on Facebook from really rotten truly offensive stuff to petty, silly, downright ridiculous stuff.  At times, people even get their panties in a wad over innocent things that were never intended to offend anyone, but what is sad is when the offended person refuses to let it go regardless how many apologies are forth coming.

Please, let me repeat!  Facebook is people being people, and if you can’t accept that, you have no business being on Facebook.  People post for a variety of reasons, and other than holding a stinky rotten cheese stick to their head, there is little anyone can do about it.  If a person owns a computer, tablet, or smart phone, with a Facebook app, they can post whatever they please.  If it offends, you can laugh it off, you can ignore it, you can lash out, you can hold a grudge, you can act like a blooming idiot and make a fool of yourself, you can offend them back, you can dig up dirty laundry you know about the offender and post it, or you can unfriend the offender, but that is about all you can do.  As of now, offending someone – intentionally or unintentionally – is not punishable by prison time or the death chamber, so move on – let it go, especially if the offending person offers an apology.  Remember, Facebook is people being people, so accept it, or go do something more constructive with your time like read a book.

People being People on Facebook:

  1. People who post to witness and share their religious status;
  2. People who post because they are lonely and seek human contact;
  3. People who post to be funny or humorous (at least they try);
  4. People who post to share something that makes them happy or excited;
  5. People who post to affirm their existence;
  6. People who post to share a political or social view or rant;
  7. People who post because they are on Facebook and don’t want to be perceived as lurking in the background;
  8. People who post to provoke a rise out of people or get their goat;
  9. People who post to Facebook as a family scrap book;
  10. People who post because it is easier to post to Facebook than actually talk to people;
  11. People who post because they like noise of any kind in their lives;
  12. People who post because they don’t have a life;
  13. People who post because deep down they really like people and like being around them;
  14. People who post on Facebook because they have a short attention span and cannot read or write anything beyond a handful of sentences;
  15. People who post because Facebook is the only family they have;
  16. People who post to share their pity party;
  17. People who post to keep up with friends;
  18. People who post because it gives them a sense of being somebody;
  19. People who post to simply inform; and
  20. People who post because they can.

Facebook is people being people!

JL

©Jack Linton, April 27, 2017

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People I Find Hard to Handle!

Nine people I find hard to handle, yet at times I may be guilty of acting like them:

  • People who blow their nose in public and then open the tissue or handkerchief to take a look! If you need to blow your nose in public, please do so, but do you really need to look at it afterwards?  What do you expect to find – brain residue?
  • People who text and drive! Thank the good Lord, I am not very good at texting, so texting and driving is not a problem for me!  People who text and drive should drive with a revolver with one bullet in the cylinder next to them on the seat.  That way just before they text, they can pick up the gun, spin the cylinder, put the gun to their head, and pull the trigger.  The odds are the same that sooner or later the gun will fire and texting while driving will lead to a deadly accident.  Every time I see a person texting while driving, I always think, “There goes a funeral waiting to happen;”
  • Fat guys who wear a Speedo on the beach! I have never been guilty of this, but if I ever find myself alone in the world with no family or friends, this will be my way of getting even with the world!
  • People who think a “Yield” sign means they have the right-of-way! We’ve all been there. We are driving down the highway when from the corner of our eye we see some bozo merging from a side ramp without bothering to look to see if a car is the lane.  The result, we slam on brakes to let him in to prevent an accident.  Bozo continues along his merry way never aware that his failure to adhere to the yield sign and merge properly almost caused an accident;
  • Overweight women who wear a two piece on the beach! There are certain things that are simply unbecoming on a woman wearing a two piece bathing suit at the beach:  a cigarette in her mouth; dried out leathery skin; a stretched out boat anchor tattoo on her belly; boobs she kicks when she walks; and bikini bottoms that read, “Danger, wide load!”
  • People who smoke! There are few things in this world nastier than cigarette smoke.  Tried it one time, but thank God, it made me sicker than a dog, so I never tried it again.  If a person wants to commit suicide by smoking, that is his/her choice, but they should do it in the privacy of their home away from people who enjoy living;
  • People who cannot express themselves without the use of profanity. Unfortunately, when frustrated or I smash my thumb with a hammer, I have been known to use words I later regretted and made me ashamed of myself.  However, outside those times, I try my best to avoid thinking with my brain stem and using “hardcore profanity.”  Heck, it bothers me to hear just about everyone these days say, “I gotta go pee.”  Whatever happened to “I gotta go to the bathroom,” or “I gotta go to the restroom?”  I really don’t understand why it is so important for folks to broadcast which bodily excretion they need to discharge;
  • People who cannot accept others for who they are! Most people have been guilty of pushing their agendas on others at one time or another.  People feel comfortable when the world around them conforms to them.  However, not everyone is like me or you, and that is okay.  Unfortunately, far too many people in our society don’t feel that way.  If people do not think like them, believe like them, or live like them, some folks cannot rest until those people are converted into a “mini me.”  If conversion is not possible, therein lies the underlying current of tension in our society; and
  • People who are offended by everything! Most people, including me, have been offended at some point in their lives.  However, most sane people do not make it a habit to look for things to offend them, which is too often the case in our world today.  If something offends you, it’s okay to address it, but in the name of Bozo the Clown, don’t park your insecurities on the offense and make your life and the lives of everyone around you miserable – MOVE ON!  Therefore, if I offended you with this blog, MOVE ON!  I can assure you I was not thinking of you personally when I wrote the blog unless you are one of the people mentioned above in which case I am the one offended, so I shall now MOVE ON!

JL

©Jack Linton, April 9, 2017

10 Words Guaranteed to Make You Less Offensive

It is getting to the point a person cannot say anything without offending someone. In our world of magnified sensitivity and political correctness, just about every word uttered has the potential to be offensive. That means people, like me, are being forced to relearn the English language to avoid using a word or phrase that might offend. That is sad; language is intended to be conversational, informative, inquisitive, expressive, and sometimes even offensive. If not why open your mouth at all other than to eat or drink? In the very near future, I foresee my wife treating me like a smoker and asking me to step outside before I open my mouth to speak, so I don’t offend someone in my own home. Seriously, people are scrutinizing every word you say looking for a hint of something offensive. Am I the only one who thinks this “sensitivity” stuff has gone off the deep end?

Don’t get me wrong; I am all for being sensitive and not deliberately hurting a person’s feelings, but I honestly can’t understand why I must be held so responsible for another person’s personal and emotional insecurities that I have to walk on eggshells and make myself as miserable as they apparently are. It has reached the point that everywhere you go the politically correct police, people with personally transmitted social issues, and offendamites are looking over your shoulder ready to pounce on the slightest verbal indiscretion. I am not out to intentionally offend anyone, but damn if I can convince some people of that. It has got so bad that when I enter a public restroom I turn on the water in the sink and flush all the toilets to cover any sounds I might make doing my business; heaven forbid, I offend someone listening outside the door.

Who are these people watching me (us) so closely? I mentioned the politically correct police, people with personally transmitted social issues, and offendamites earlier. Although there are others, these three groups seem to be the biggest watchdogs for offensiveness on the scene today. The politically correct police are everywhere! They can be found in the news media, on Facebook, and across society in general. Although their original calling was most likely noble, since partnering with group two, individuals with personally transmitted social issues, as well as with every fetish and nondescript noncomplying societal fringe cause, they have succumbed to being little more than paranoid enablers. As a result, a bear can’t wee-wee (didn’t want to offend anyone) in the woods without offending such groups as the Order of the Blue Moose Against Forest Defecation. And, then there are the offendamites! Bless their hearts, offemdamites are those poor souls who go through life looking for something to offend them. They are offended by anything or anyone who contradicts their limited and often biased knowledge as well as their not always “lily white” sense of justice and what is right. Between the politically correct police and the offendamites, regular people no longer have a chance. We will forever be offending someone.

Therefore, to help those of us who are fundamentally non-offensive incompetent, I have devised a cheat sheet to hopefully keep us out of trouble with the politically correct police and the offendamites. Please, study the following chart carefully. It is not all inclusive (At the rate people are being offended today, creating an all-inclusive chart would be an impossible task), but it does provide some key words to avoid if you hope to be politically correct. Some of the chart may not make sense, but as a society we are long past making sense, so get over it. Oops, that was probably offensive to someone. Sorry.

Avoid Being Politically Incorrect Survival Chart

Definitions You Need to Know:

Politically Correct Police:                 Unnamed enforcers of everything that is politically correct.

Offendamites:                                   People who look for ways to be offended.

Gender Specific:                               Man, woman, boy, girl, son, daughter

Transgenders:                                  People confused as to their sexual orientation.

Misgendering:                                   Incorrect usage of gender specific pronouns: he, she, him, her.

Offensive Word

How Used

Why they are offended and Who is Offended:

USE THIS INSTEAD

Mama

I love my mama.

“Mama” is gender specific, to be politically correct we must avoid gender specific terms.

OFFENDED: Transgenders, Those with mama issues, some feminists, Politically Correct Police

GENETIC ICUBATOR

“I love my genetic incubator.”

He, she, him, her, his, hers

He walked into the room.

These are gender specific pronouns and to use these terms is to risk “misgendering.”

OFFENDED: Transgenders and Politically Correct Police

IT

“It walked into the room.

Boy or Girl

The boy walked into the room.

To be politically correct all instances of misgendering must be avoided.

OFFENDED: Transgenders and Politically Correct Police

SHIM

The shim walked into the room.

Man or Woman

The man and woman went on a trip.

More gender specific to be avoided.

OFFENDED: Transgenders and Politically Correct Police

X and Y

X and Y went on a trip.

Mr., Mrs, Miss

Dear Mr. Smith,

One more instance of gender specific to be avoided.

OFFENDED: Transgenders and Politically Correct Police

GENDER INCLUSIVE

Dear Gender Inclusive Smith,

Special

That is so special!

Denotes approval and unless you are open to approving everyone and everything, you should avoid using the word “special.”

OFFENDED: Offendamites, Politically Correct Police

ACCEPTABLE

That is so acceptable!

Son of a Gun

That son of a gun did it again!

This offends on so many different fronts. It offends because the expression humanizes guns. It offends by alluding to the reproductive potential of guns. Also, “son” is gender specific and should be avoided.

OFFENDED: Offendamites, Humanists, 2nd Amendment Haters, Politically Correct Police

AVOID USING ANY “GUN” RELATED TERM OR PHRASE.

That x did it again!

USE A LOWER CASE “x” FOR “son” AND LOWER CASE “y” FOR DAUGHTER.

Dead

Unfortunately, James is dead.

Although a fact of end of life, this word offends many people.

OFFENDED:   Offendamites, non-Christians

LIVING IMPAIRED

Unfortunately, James is living impaired.

Suck

That movie sucks!

Although this term has become common in our society there are still some who are offended by it.

OFFENDED:   Offendamites, Baby Boomers, Church Ladies

LIP VACUUM

That movie is a lip vacuum!

Non-disabled life time welfare recipient

Uncle Jeb is a non-disabled life time welfare recipient.

Most people understand there are many people who legitimately receive welfare and disability benefits, but they are offended by those who could work but don’t.

OFFENDED:   Hard working tax payers busting their butts to make a living.

LEISURE MANIPULATOR

Uncle Jeb is a leisure manipulator.

Hopefully, this chart will provide enough information to keep people out of trouble. The best way to do that though is to lock yourself in your home and don’t entertain company outside of your family, have your groceries delivered, and avoid contact with the delivery folks at all costs. Even then, your husband or wife may still ask you to step outside before you open your mouth to speak. If they do, go sit with the dog and be thankful he doesn’t mind if you are politically correct or not as long as you scratch behind his ear. Of course, to be fair, you must do the same for the cat when he comes around. Come to think of it, maybe this is where all this political correctness started. It is certainly for the dogs! Oh yes, and for the cats as well.

JL

©Jack Linton, September 18, 2015